From The Daily Mash:
LEADING a dull suburban life with a mortgage and two children is now a phenomenal achievement, everyone has agreed.
Modern life has become so challenging that ‘averageness’ is now considered an ambition on a par with becoming an acclaimed novelist, professional sportsperson or successful entrepreneur...
Factory supervisor Roy Hobbs said: “With my small detached house, ‘luxury’ caravan and three ISAs, I’m living the dream, although not a very interesting one.
“My advice is to have the purely coincidental good fortune to buy a house just before a massive property boom that fucks everyone else.”